June 4, 2012

After a good weekend, it's really hard to find my motivation

After a week where each day felt like a sprint to finish by 5 and pick up Brex, I finished enough stuff that I could take the weekend off. Phew! Jrex was similarly slammed with a big grant due Friday and then having to be in the hospital for the afternoon seeing patients. Of course, he had 6 consults and 3 family meetings that day (the norm is 2-3 consults), and therefore arrived home at the early hour of 10:30 PM.

While the baby napped on Saturday, I went to a neighborhood mom event. It was an info session on a company that does freeze dried food. BPA-free cans and a LONG list of ingredients that can be eaten straight, or rehydrated to make easy dinners. Sounds like backpacking food to me, but that's not a bad thing.

When I arrived, I noticed an Asian woman with her baby on her back. He had on a huge sunhat and sunglasses, so I couldn't see what he looked like. Since north Oak Cliff tends to be either Hispanic or Anglo with some African-Americans, seeing an Asian is rare though not unheard of. As much as I wanted to run over and chat her up, I played it cool. Everyone was talking in a circle so I joined in. Of course people were discussing the stupid Time magazine cover and mostly agreeing that it was designed to fuel the mommy wars and sell magazines. As the Asian woman (J-Mom) said, and the rest of us agreed, "We're all doing the best we can, judging each other isn't helping anyone!"

Talk wandered along and I don't know how it came up, but someone else said something and all of a sudden, J-Mom said, "Are you OTRgirl!? I've seen your last name on some of the neighborhood emails and wanted to meet you. Someone told me it was your husband who's Korean and that's why the K-last name."

I smiled back, "Yeah. I've walked into job interviews and caused many double-takes, especially in the Bay Area where they know what K-last name means. Are you Korean, too?"

She nodded, "I've got a Hapa baby back here." We kept chatting until the info session started and when it was over, exchanged contact info. We're going to try to get together next weekend. She's a little far for an easy walk, but definitely within an easy bike ride. Of course Jrex is a bit uncomfortable with me getting a bike seat (why? It's not like I crash or fall of my bike more than a couple times a year? Sheesh.), so I might have to wait a few years to bike over there. She's hoping we can get together regularly. Both of us agreed that we'd been nervous our kid would grow up feeling like the only one in the area.

We didn't really bond with the other couple (Phillipina/Anglo) that we met after we moved in. She's a bit shrill and he's much older. Plus, they moved far enough that we have to drive to see them, and it's much less enticing to overcome the social stuff if we have to put too much effort into the experience.

I'm well aware that I get excited by new relationships, the fun thing was to see that we both seemed mutually excited. She was so happy that she could refer to eye-fold issues without having to explain. I had fun being able to refer to her baby's HUGE cheeks as perfect Korean baby cheeks without having to explain. I thought Brex had some Korean cheeks, but he looks gaunt compared to B-boy. Her son also has a Korean name in the house and an American one outside the house. We didn't talk about it, but something that occurs to me now, Korean food is labor intensive, but we could potentially make it together and split it.

So, I'm sitting here with my to-do list glaring at me, my poor beleaguered Father outside in 100-degree heat staining the door and I'm writing a blog post instead of working.

If I left my motivation at your house, could you toss it back over the fence?


Mizasiwa said...

I lllove reading your posts!!! I didnt find your motivation though sorry ;-) Really glad you have found a Korean family that could potentially turn into a great friendship, its sounds lovely!!

Alice said...

Hi there! I've been a fan of your blog for a while now and have enjoyed following you and your family's adventures. Since we may be moving in the near future for DH's fellowship training, can you give me your perspective of raising multi-racial kids ("hapa") in your new area? TX is definitely on the radar. Thanks!!!