January 14, 2013

And you were there...and you...and you

I'm back in the office. In California. For a week. Alone.

The baby, the mutt, the husband are all trying to survive each other at home. I flew here yesterday afternoon. This morning, I received the following email from Jrex telling me how the evening and morning went:
Hi Hon,

Hope you had a good night's sleep. Unfortunately, Brex didn't. Woke up at 2 and 4:30a. Then completely at 5:30a, gave him some milk - had about 2-3 oz but then was falling asleep while drinking the milk. Went back to sleep at 6a and woke up 7:30a, completely lost his mind. Interesting to change him while he's completely thrashing around. Finally settled down when I gave him some date-pecan bread in the kitchen and our happy boy returned. Yeesh. I think I lost a year of my life this morning. Also, as I left him at daycare, his big ol' eyes started to tear up.

I'm sure he'll be fine in the long run but it's going to be fun. Clearly, he's missing you.
I hate that Brex is sad without me there. It especially stinks that he's suffering without understanding why. Jrex and I chatted after I saw his email and agreed that Skype might make it worse for Brex: seeing me, but not understanding why I can't pick him up.

The strange thing on this end is that being back at the office, it feels like I never left. Which means that my time in Texas feels like a strange dream. And yet in that dream I have a child.

I've been running around the office saying hello to various people. There are so many co-workers that I really enjoy as people, yet have no business reason to call. We've all been happy to see each other and do a little catch up. Then for lunch today, it felt amazing to think about what food I wanted to try: Japanese? Indian? Turkish? Afghani? Thai? Peruvian? All within a 10-minute drive.

I love being back. I (selfishly) love being alone. I totally miss my kiddo and husband (and the mutt). All mixed up in a big pile of disorientation. Which version is the dream? Will I wake up in Oz or Kansas?

I'm enjoying this dream while I'm in it, but I'll be happy to go home again.

2 comments:

Rachel said...

It's good for them! And you too, I'm sure. :) In the long run, their relationship will be stronger for being on their own this week, and you get a well-earned rest.

Inkling said...

Wow. Talk about an adventure for you all! I hope you enjoy this alone time, even though it's work. And I hope that JRex and BRex find their rhythm and that they make it through with smiles in the end.

I haven't ever been away more than two nights since having my kiddo. I thought my heart would explode the first time I left him at the babysitter for just a few hours, so when I went on a three day retreat, it was hard. But man, the alone time with just grown-ups was glorious. And it felt like total luxury to go to the bathroom all.by.myself., and eat a meal without having to cut it all up at once so I could balance a fussy toddler in one arm. It was glorious, now that I think about it. =)

Have a fun time back "home". And may you feel like you're heading "home" when you go back to Texas. I find that every time I return back here from a trip to visit my old home, it feels a little more like home each time. Safe travels.