March 13, 2009

How I suffer, part 2

While excursions and visitors can be surprisingly tiring, it's also crazy-making to just stay in the house. I've never liked watching TV that much, so I can only do 2-3 episodes of GG in a row.

The last two days we did two excursions. On Wednesday we visited the Cantor art museum just down the road at Stanford.



Then, yesterday, we drove up to Fort Funston in San Francisco. Everyone who has a dog has recommended visiting it, so when OTRmama commented that the dogs were restless, I thought that would be a fun day trip.



I've never seen SO many dogs in my life! There were at least 10 dog walkers, each with 7-10 dogs. Dozens of people with one or two dogs.

AND there's a hang gliding take-off/landing spot.

The other weird thing, OTRmama commented this morning that it's my Mom's birthday today. It hadn't even occurred to me. The strangest thing is that it doesn't make me sad at all. Mom being gone is a fact of life. Sure it would be nice to have her around, but my life has reshaped around the hole and there's no more active ache. It was very strange however to realize she would be turning 70 today. That sounds old. Sure my Dad has gotten older, but I saw his 60's happen, with Mom, I don't know what that decade would have contained. At least now when she shows up in my dreams, she's no longer the cancer version; when I see her, she's healthy and in her 30's with vibrant hair and smile.

I'm glad that in honor of her birthday, I get to spend time with her best friend. OTRmama brought me Mom's bread recipe. Perhaps that's what I'll attempt today in her honor. Throughout my elementary school years, I came home to the smell of cookies or bread and Mom asking, "How was your day?" as she cleaned up the kitchen.

7 comments:

Lil Sis said...

Glad you're doing well...some of my best childhood memories are coming home and my mom being there, she would bake sometimes, read rarely, but she usually wasn't home since they both worked, and we were latch key kids, on the days she was there it was just great.

OTR sister said...

My computer nicely pops up a reminder about special events, so I knew today was Mom's birthday. It hadn't occurred to me to do the math. 70? Really?! Wow.

Asianmommy said...

How nice to have your mom's friend with you to bring you specials memories of her.

Anonymous said...

Your comments about your Mom made me sad.
A good kind of sadness. 70 years-old. It would have been so good to grow old together. So many things to share. We would have been racing to our computers to get your latest Sojournerings and the grandchildren's latest Twitters. She would have been an excellent grandmother, quite content to let the
grandchildren be children, with little expectation of their being tiny adults. It's sad that we missed so much.

Mama Nabi said...

Wow. You are the most active "invalid" I know. :-)

Your dad paints a very lovely picture of your mom as a grandmother - made me sniffle and tear up a bit. How wonderful to have shared and remembered your mom with OTRmom on her birthday...

Anonymous said...

Expectation for the week ahead:
Your boss sees you at the mall.

Aimee said...

That is a very sweet memory (baking and asking how your day was). Thank you for sharing it.