There's no place like home

Last week was insanely busy. On Friday we presented a creative proposal for a us3r c0nference, we treated the standup presentat1on as a mini-confer3nce. It's a great idea, but meant designing a website, email blast, give-away bag and water bottle in addition to the regular standup presentat1on deck. Unfortunately, at the moment we don't have a robust pool of freelancers to pull into the office, so the only other design resource I had in hand was more of a production artist. That meant I couldn't just give her design and let her own it, so I had to do it all. On top of all that, we got hit with deliverables for a new client.

Needless to say, I barely saw anyone. I made time to see friends on Wednesday night, but otherwise I was buried in the office. I did get everything finished Thursday in time to catch the last 2/3rds of Much Ado About Nothing. It's a modernization, but Joss Whedon did a smart thing and filmed in black and white. It gives just enough of an 'old' feel that the language doesn't feel contrived in the modern context. That said, a plot that revolves around whether or not a woman in her early 20's is still a 'maid' feels far fetched, but they made it work.

Beatrice hiding to listen in on Hero telling the maid
about Benedick's hidden passion for Beatrice.

Once back home, we spent a mellow Saturday just hanging out as a family. Long naps for all three of us that afternoon. Then Jrex and I went out to see Superman. The casting was amazing, the acting was really good, the Messianic moments cracked me up, and the ending was over the top, but overall we enjoyed it.

Jrex turned 45 while I was in California. I'd left two gifts hidden for him. I wrote in the card, "Here's hoping you don't have any lingering Korean superstitions. If you do, I'm going with the 'two wrongs make a right' theory."

I gave him two clocks.

In Korean culture, if one gives a clock, it's a death wish for the recipient. As in, time is ticking toward your demise. Nice, right? Obviously, NOT what I want for him. He'd been wanting one next to his bed as well as an atomic clock in the bathroom. For the bedside clock, look what I found!

It's a water powered digital clock. You fill it with tap water and the ions in the water are enough to power the clock for up to five months.

Sunday night I'd invited a couple to join us for Korean food. They brought a homemade cake and a box full of gin and whisky. After dinner, the wife and I chatted and played with their 5-year old son while the guys did a 'tasting'. Let's just say Jrex was quite relaxed and happy when they left!

It's great to be home. The fun continues tomorrow when Jrex's mom and niece arrive from California. They'll be with us through Sunday. We're really looking forward to seeing Asian niece and watching her and Brex fall in love. She's 8-years old so I expect she'll really enjoy Brex and his antics.

And back again.

I'm off to Cally in the morning. Another work trip. This one was planned in advance. Our other 2D designer is gallevanting around Europe with his family and I'm going in to cover one of the weeks that he's gone.

This trip feels harder in terms of leaving Brex. He's learning so much each day, also testing limits and trying our patience, but then giggling and cuddling to make up for it. Each day the tricks I use to motivate him seem to evolve. It's like he's a super adaptable virus and I can barely keep ahead of him to suppress the outbreaks. The current 'go to' tricks include tons of reverse psychology. "Oh, you don't want to go to bed. That's ok. You stay downstairs, I'm going up." He usually comes running. This technique often involves conversations with Muttola, "Mmmm...this snack of banana and peanut butter is SO good. Too bad Brex didn't want any." At that point I'm usually interrupted by a little voice next to me proclaiming, "Chair!" (he wants up into his chair so he can partake)

For transitions we say 'bye bye'. As in, trying to get him to leave the water table at the Science Museum, "OK, buddy, it's time to say bye bye to the water. Bye Bye boats. Bye Bye cup." He cries in protest and then tearfully begins to join in the Bye Byes as we make our exit.

To get him to let me change his pajamas into his day clothes, we say 'bye bye' to whatever is on the pj's and hello to whatever is on the clothes. "Ready to say hello doggy and bye bye dinosaur?"

Jrex has also been really busy trying to get another round of grants submitted. Each time he gets subsumed by work, Brex begins to prefer me to an extreme measure and even seem to get nervous around his Dad. All it takes are a couple play sessions and Brex is fine, but it makes it that much harder to leave. On the other hand, I'm sure it's nice for Jrex to get some time to figure things out on his own.

I've prepped Brex that I'm leaving. I made a paper chain with five rings so he can tear one off each day. I "charged up" his stuffed rhino with hugs so he can hug it any time he misses me.

In the end, it'll be a nice break to recharge a bit, but the last couple days will be tough. Flying home Friday night helps. It makes if feel less like I'm missing out.

I've only scheduled one social visit while I'm there. I anticipate a heavy work load this week and suspect I'll need the down time. I'm hoping I can get away from work early enough to catch a couple movies. I'd like to see Before Midnight, Much Ado About Nothing and possibly, This is the End. Anyone have opinions on any of those (or other suggestions?)

I'll keep you posted!

The Manifesto

I just saw a job posting for something local that is written for me. Problem? I have no website, no online portfolio, and no resume. I did buy the domain for  [My].[Name].com last year, so I have that in my favor. I'm trying to whip all this together so I can apply for it. I love my job (believe it or not), but local might be a nice change.

Either way, I should have a website up. To that end, I sat down to write out my design manifesto. What do you think:

I believe...

we are all creative
strong leadership doesn't have to be abrasive
your input is valid
working fast ≠ working sloppy
the person matters more than the task
in sophisticated boldness
in simple elegance
in tickling children and wrestling dogs
organization is beautiful
family dinners matter
it's more important to be resilient than safe
Design Divas waste all of our time
everyone has a story
strong opinions streamline the process
I'm an awesome Mom and a so-so wife
in mystery, silence and beauty
in laughter, tears and good wine
in the power of white space
mood boards matter
listening first never hurt anyone


Anything I should add? Delete? Rephrase? (see point #1)

Kindness when I needed it

Sunday morning. Sitting in the creaky wooden pew with Brex on my lap. He's playing peek-a-boo with a boy in the next pew. They're giggling as the music covers any sounds they make. I'm trying to enter into the music, the sense of God's presence, but I'm having a hard time.

In the last few weeks, I've been experiencing more stomach churning anxiety than I have my whole life. There have been times in the past when I feel things that are happening to someone else and it's a clue for me to pray. Once I kept thinking about driving my car off the road on purpose. It happened over and over and was definitely not 'me'. When I prayed, I kept thinking of one friend in particular. I asked if she were feeling suicidal. She was. The only thing that's changed in my life of late is my new Creat1ve Director. So, I've been praying for him. While I'm at it, I've prayed for my husband. Now, that all makes me sound 1) psyco/psychic or 2) holy. Neither is true! Mostly I pray just enough to get my stomach to calm down.

As I tried to pray during the worship time at church, I just felt so bad that my real motivator in life is my own comfort. I'll do just enough to get comfy again. I'm not really pursuing God, not really doing much to strengthen my marriage. Yes, working hard as a Mom, and as a designer, but letting most of the rest fall by the wayside. I paused and prayed, "What do You have to say?"

In the pause after I asked, this popped into my head, "O little fretful one, you're judging yourself much more harshly than I am. Just look to me and the selfishness will fall away." That sounds so small when I write it down, but there was a sense of being smiled at and enjoyed behind the words.

There's a verse that says, "It's Your kindness, Lord, that leads us to repentance." I cried in gratitude as the songs continued. He sees me and he loves me anyway.

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This is off topic, but Brex is at the point where anything works as a "hat". He wanted this on his head and was quite proud of it for the two minutes he wore it.  His stroller is also "chair!" and he loves to just sit in it and watch us cooking in the kitchen. A prince indeed.

Checking In

When I get overwhelmed at work I lose my capacity to handle other people. Until yesterday I was juggling frantically and not wanting to call anyone, read blogs, write a blog entry or check Facebook. My social needs are based on boredom? Or more aptly, capacity I suppose.

Yesterday I woke up at 6 AM with my stomach churning and my to-do list prodding me out of bed. I did the math and realized I didn't have enough hours in my week to finish everything in front of me. I sent an email to our GenMgr and my new ExecCreativDirector. Without whining, I outlined the new jobs that had hit my inbox since Friday and estimated design hours against those jobs.

On top of that, I was spearheading an RFP response. That particular RFP was shaping up to be a trainwreck unless I intervened like Super Woman holding up the track so the RFP could be safely delivered. We had a bunch of Chiefs who weren't actually doing any thing. It felt like everyone on the team was letting me handle it. Our ECD was justifiably overwhelmed. They've been flying him around the country to let him meet the other offices. As a result, he kept not being in Creative Bra1nstorms that he was supposed to lead! Then I'd have to lead it, while not knowing what He would have done. Then talk to him on the phone to give him a recap. Total chaos, though not his fault. 

To his credit, after the Hail Mary email, he pulled in resources and now I find myself not doing much! We brought in an amazing freelancer to cover the RFP so I'm out of that. Phew! I'm waiting for access to client files on one job and waiting for approvals on another.

In good news, we've been selected as The Agency by the last three RFPs that I helped generate. I guess now we need to find people to interview and hire!

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In Brex news, each day he surprises me by something new that he's absorbed. His word for any letter is "E"? Since there's usually an E, it makes him sound brilliant when he points to something and says, "E!"

He loves to point, well, poke, body parts while naming them. It's cute when it's "Mou", "Chee" and "Haih", but not so good when he wants to move my glasses to poke, "Eye".

I've learned that I can't assume he's wrong when he's saying a word. Yesterday as he sat in his car seat looking at his favorite book:

I kept hearing him say, "Cheep"...."Cheep". I was going to say, "There's no chicken!", but turned to check (at a stop light), and saw he was looking at a Jeep. So, instead, "That's right, buddy! A Jeep."

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Overall, life is good. Busy, happy, content, overwhelming and tiring all at once.

Third time's the charm?

Rochester: Car next to the house while we were sleeping. Cops showed up within a few hours. Car found within a week.

Baltimore: Wedding ring, engagement ring, jade ring, laptop. Through the back door during the day while we were at work. No cop ever came. I had to request a crime scene investigator. Then waited until 1 AM for him to have time between murder scenes to swing by and fingerprint. Nothing ever found. No follow up.

Dallas: Bike, Bike pump, 8-foot aluminum step ladder, toolbox (old tools). Contractor's tools, 6-foot ladder and paint supplies. From the open garage, through the open gate while we were doing things on the far side of the fence.

We weren't going to call the cops about this burglary. None of the stolen items added up to our deductible, so it didn't seem worth it. However, after a Facebook post about the burglary, a friend asked about recent neighborhood break-ins, "Do you think this is the same guy?" In the most recent incident, he'd kicked in a garage door.

I called the detective on those cases to see if he thought it was worth reporting. He asked me what they'd taken. I listed the stuff above, then added, "The ballsiest thing they did was go through some thrift store donation bags I had in the garage, strew the clothes all over, then take one of the three bags to carry what they took."

He got excited, "Ma'am, what were the bags made of?"

"One was plastic."

"Could you please call it in and ask for fingerprinting? All I've got for evidence are a couple of photos that could be anyone and a bad video. None of the other victims asked for prints."

So, in the midst of a day full of deadlines, I called 9-1-1. Within 30 minutes, an officer knocked on the back door (the gate was open since our contractor was working in the alley). Muttola went CRAZY. No one comes to the back door first.

"Good girl. That's your job."

I praised her as I held her back and opened the door. The cop asked for details, and we toured the garage. Then we headed to the alley to chat with the contractor about what he was missing and when he noticed it. While we were talking with him, as a collarless Muttola sniffed the grass at my feet, two cops rode into the alley. I held the dog back so she wouldn't attack the horses. (We're definitely in Texas, y'all! Horses!!) The officer told them the crime had happened sometime in the last few days so there wasn't a need for them to do street patrol.

[pause. Now visualize being a thief running down the street as you're being chased by a horse...]

An hour after the officer left, the doorbell rang. I assumed it would be the fingerprint team, but NOOOOoooo. Alarm chasers. They must listen to the police scanner and then show up to the house to sell an alarm. Half an hour after they left, it was my neighbor. They'd knocked on her door, too!

THEN it was the fingerprint officer. I loved the irony that the woman responding to the actual crime was a petite, though tough looking, woman. The guy doing the post-crime analysis was over six feet tall and obviously lifted weights on a regular basis.

The good news is he found three viable prints. Now we just hope that one of them belongs to the thieves.

You know you live in Texas when...

...you get an estimate from a guy named J1mbo. Turns out he went to high school here in the Cliff. Great guy. Warm Texan accent.

He's been a mason his whole working life and prides himself on doing his work well. As we looked a project we need to finish in the back yard, he examined my cousin's work on our circular patio.

He couldn't believe that JR was able to do eyeball cuts with a tile saw.

"Them's some tight joints! I like to see quality work. He's a real mason. That's just beautiful."

I agreed, "Yeah, he's definitely an artist."

After business was finished, we launched into the story swap. We'd both seen (and cried) watching the video of the woman in Moore whose dog shows up while she's getting interviewed: http://houston.cbslocal.com/2013/05/21/woman-finds-dog-lost-during-tornado-while-being-interviewed/

Then he tells me about a tornado that went through Wichita Falls 35 years ago. They'd dropped off his 7-month old son to visit the grandparents. The next day a half-mile wide tornado went down the town's main street. He and his wife drove up that night, black cloud still looming on the horizon.

When they got to the house, it was cut in half with a car up against the side of it. They found the family dog in a locked bathroom, but not his family. As they were panicking a neighbor came over and told them the family was safe down the street at the church. Phew! His father-in-law had held the closet doors shut by sheer force of will less the twister suck them all out the door.

"Them twisters is freaky! We found a loaf of bread, still closed in its wrapper, but packed full of dirt so's you couldn't eat it. There was gas tanks, still closed with rags hanging out the pipe. It sets up some crazy vacuum. Straws was stickin' out of walls. I hope I never see the like again."

Me, too, sir. Me, too.